Tuesday, May 26, 2009

The elevator door conundrum

I'm not exactly sure where this tradition originated, but I am seriously, seriously done with having to thank the person who chooses to stand outside of the elevator door and use their arm to "hold it open" as I walk inside. I understand that you are probably just trying to show your kindness by graciously extending one of your extremities to ensure that I do not get accosted whilst entering...But, honestly? Please do not feel the need to engage in this sort of behavior any longer. I am fully capable of holding my own elevator door open and do not need anyone's assistance. If anything, it truly just makes things awkward. After you do so, I am forced to thank you profusely as if you have done something noble like save me from getting hit by a taxi. Chances are, you have done nothing at all. The door was not even attempting to close itself on me. I walk inside and you enter last with a big grin on your face; then continue to look at me as if I owe you your next round at the bar. When I get into an elevator in the morning, all I want to do is finish the song that is currently on my ipod and think about how many minutes I have until I can go back outside for lunch. Holding your arm against the door deserves nothing more than a smile. Maybe a smile. Especially when the behavior occurs prior to me having the opportunity to take a sip of my morning starbucks. Moving forward, feel free to keep you arms to yourself and walk into the elevator just like everyone else chooses to do so. The level of respect will skyrocket and we can all have a happy and comfortable ride up to our respective floors. No awkwardness whatsoever! Sound good?

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5 comments:

  1. AnonymousMay 26, 2009 at 10:59 PM

    I like when people hold the door for me :(

    ReplyDelete
  2. ChrisMay 26, 2009 at 11:34 PM

    I prefer to violently kick or hit the door as it's closing to get it open. People usually look at me like I'm nuts.

    ReplyDelete
  3. SchrockStarMay 27, 2009 at 11:21 PM

    What's up with people who are waiting to get on the elevator and don't wait for all occupants to get off first? It's the oldest form of idiocy in Elevator history!
    You KNOW the door will open for at least 4 seconds - WHY do you immediately step forward when they open? Do you think the elevator is there to service you only?

    ReplyDelete
  4. LauraMay 28, 2009 at 12:56 PM

    my elevator gripe= when men are trying to be polite and let women exit before them... even when they are standing in the front of a crowded elevator and females in the back. I am not sure where that tradition comes from, and I appriciate politeness, but this is a case where I value efficiency over decorum.

    ReplyDelete
  5. CraigPJuly 14, 2009 at 4:08 PM

    We just want to scope that ass.

    ReplyDelete

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